Pity Party

Many of you have probably seen the video that showed how inaccurately women percieve themselves (http://mashable.com/2013/04/15/dove-ad-beauty-sketches/), so I know that I'm not the only one that has thrown themselves a pity party a time or two.  I just felt like I wanted to share my experience.

I am currently training for a marathon in June.  Training in Idaho in the springtime is somewhat of a joke.  One day it is sunny and 70 degrees and then the next it is 30 degrees and snowing (either way it's windy).  On Saturday the plan was to run 20 miles with Priscilla.  I was going to pick her up at her house in Inkom and then we were going to drive up to the top of Buckskin and run down towards Pocatello.  Friday night and into Saturday morning I woke up several times to the sound of pouring rain.  Finally, around 5:30 a.m. I texted Priscilla and told her that I just couldn't handle running in the rain and wind.  I felt like a big loser, but after running a half marathon in the wind the week before, I was not up to it.  I decided to head over to the gym and see how far I could make it on the treadmill.  I listened to Discovery of Witches and to keep me from totally dying of boredom, I would either adjust the speed or incline every minute.  At mile 10 my friend Sarah showed up.  I changed treadmills and ran 2 miles with her.  I went back to my favorite treadmill and ran another 5 miles and then my friend Melissa showed up.  I begged her to keep me company for my last 3 miles, which she did.  I couldn't believe that I had ran 20 miles on a treadmill!

Today, it was snowing sideways.  I couldn't stomach running on the treadmill, so I decided to rebel and go to Tabata class instead of doing the 7 mile run that I was supposed to do.  During the whole class I criticized everything from my hair to my short legs.  Then during Pilates, I criticized everything from the way I treated my family and friends to my lack of spirituality.  My husband was home when I got home, so I told him that I was a big loser.  He asked me why, so I continued to go through my list of shortcomings.  He listened patiently and then he told me that he had just watched a story on CNN about a girl who was a dancer.  She lost her leg during the Boston marathon bombing and now she will never be able to dance again.  Wow!  I felt about two inches tall at that moment.  I had just ran 20 miles on Saturday.  My body may be sore at times (ok, all the time), but I have a healthy, strong body.  I have so much to be grateful for, not just physically but also for my relationships.  I don't know what trials tomorrow will bring, but I do know that whatever it is I can handle it and what doesn't kill me, will make me stronger!